Fontaine de jouvence / Fountain of youth (Photo credit: Bruno Boutot)
If there were a real fountain of youth, would you drink the water.
Always making me think, aren’t you, Michelle? Not neccessarily a bad thing, just not what I’m used to. It makes me want to paraphrase a favorite quote~ “It’s a little early in the morning for hypothetical speculation, isn’t it?”
Of course, the natural knee jerk reaction would be “Ooh ooh ohh!!! I want some, GIMMEEEEEEEE!!!!”
But in that beautiful (and rare for me) moment when reason takes over, we must choose to look at this question logically. Just exactly what is this fountain really offering?
Eternal youth? Like in FOREVER? Or just turning back the clock to let you start over a little bit? Does how much you drink make a difference? Perhaps we need to examine these questions and their possible answers before we choose.
Think of it this way~ You could dunk your head in this fountain, greedily drink deep, then sit back and wait for a miracle.
*POOF*
You’re young and beautiful again! Yay for you!! You’re now the same age as your grown up kids. Which feels really weird and trippy, but you all get used to it. Until they start to look older than you….they continue to age and you don’t. You watch them grow old and feeble and eventually die. You see the same thing happen to your grandchildren. Well that scenario pretty much sucks, so let’s try on another one.
*SHAZAM*
You drink and all of a sudden you’re a baby. Okay great, complete do over. But your mind is also an infant, so you have no recollection of your former life, and aren’t bemoaning your bad choices or thinking you need another start. Plus, you’re a baby! Who’s going to take care of you? You’re in the remote jungle with a pack of gritty, treasure hunting explorers, some of questionable character. You’ll be lucky if you just don’t get left behind to be raised by apes or something.
Looking more and more like this Fountain Of Youth Cocktail may not be as tempting as it first appeared, huh?
But….what if you could not drink the water, but take a sample. A very large sample, like a 50 gallon barrel. Your beast of burden, Joey, gladly hauls it back to your waiting jeep. You take your barrel to your secret laboratory, burrowed out of the side of a bigass mountain..in some secret location.
Here you can experiment with this magic elixir one drop at a time, using your prisoners- you know, world class secret agents and super hot women with stupid names, to test its potency and potential, before trying it on any human victim such as yourself.
Um yeah, that’s what I’d do.
Hey, you asked.
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The Cheeky Diva 
So, you’d waterboard people with the water from the fountain? Not sure if that’s torture or not.
I’ve watched way too many Bond movies I guess. I would just start one drop at a time. If I found that it could just slow things down a bit, so my body doesn’t fall apart one piece at a time, I might just put a drop on my tongue and be done with it. It may not sound like it, but I’m really quite a nice person.
🙂
Oh, I believe you. You’ve always been kind to me.
This prompt had me thinking that I should direct my focus back towards silly, that’s what people want when they drop by my place. I’ve been rather a gloomy pain in the arse lately. Oops.
😀
I need to do more of that. I just couldn’t really come up with anything all that weird when I thought about it.
I thought yours was very good. Very thought provoking. I liked it!
I prefer to do more humor based writing, but some of these prompts just don’t bring that out of me.
Oh me either! I think I’ve shocked quite a few people with what I’ve written in response to some of them. Some of them for me are just too painful to even touch. A few have even had me shaken and in tears. I’m really quite a mess, darling!
Yeah, me too. But sometimes it’s very theraputic to just get that stuff out. Even your more sad posts I enjoyed reading. I just really like the way you write.
Thank you so much, it’s always so nice to hear that. Especially from those I myself enjoy reading. I spent so many years not writing anything, that I was doubtful about whether or not I had it in me. Now I want to do it all the time! A keyboard and the interweb makes it too easy for me to just type and publish. Yikes! Sometimes, I wonder if I should be a little more editorial when it comes to my work.
I find your writing very open and personal as well. I always enjoy reading your blog. I sincerely hope that everything works out for you and that we get to hear about your journey to happiness.
🙂
Well, thank you. I admit I have a lot of room to grow as a writer, but I think I’ve gotten better.
As far as my journey to happiness, I don’t know if that’s where my journey is leading me, but I sure hope so.
It’s a long and windy road, with lots of holes, rocks, dead animals, barbed wire and other nasty shit one has to navigate. Keep on truckin’ friend. You’ll get there.
I hope so. Thanks for the encouragement! Now, make me laugh again.
Hmmmm…crap! Can it wait until my lunch hour is over? Gotta go put gas in the car and choke down a less than appetizing Weight Watchers friendly lunch. Barf and hurl.
Oh, I guess. I’ll be waiting impatiently, though. Just so you know.
Stop making me think and be rational. How about if we bathed in it and didn’t drink it? Would it still be effective? Like if I washed my face, would all the wrinkles and loose skin disappear? And the cellulite? That too? We need to figure out a way to make this happen!!
Excellent point, my friend. I also wonder if I inject it into my spine if my arthritis would disappear, and my lowest 3 disks would get all squishy and puffy again. Maybe if I just wade in it, my bunions and hammer toes would disappear. Oh boy, that mountain lair is going to be a busy place. I need a lab partner. You up for it?
Count me in. We’ll need sponsors and maybe that reality show will become reality!
Hang on, I’m on the phone with Olay, and waiting for a call from Loreal Paris. I’ll have my people get back to your people.
Crap. Never thought of it this way. Obviously even the fountain of youth has a catch. Stupid fine print.
If I drank from it, perhaps I could see the fine print without my bifocals, but nothing comes without a price, so I’ll just keep them on. Nice to see you, my busy, now famous friend. 🙂
Where can I get one of those “Joeys” to lug around my 50 gallon barrel?
Oxen-R-Us maybe?
Hah! wonder what Google will pull up if I search that… Hmmm, maybe I better not search that, I probably don’t want to find out.
I just figured anyone who’s inclined to do this could fill in the blank with their own go-to pack mule. My puppy might be able to do the job. She would try pretty hard I bet. Maybe she could just drag it.
All I’ve got are two worthless (wonderful) cats. They’d lick the barrel and try to eat it, but they wouldn’t be much use at moving it. Maybe I should upgrade.
Put the barrel on wheels. That always helps when I try to get cats to drag something heavy for me. And of course dangling something smelly in front of them, by use of an elaborate mechanism doesn’t hurt either. Oh wait, am I going to get myself in some sort of trouble here? I need to put in a disclaimer here that no domestic animals, farm animals, or work animals were hurt in the writing of this or any other blog post, or anything else I’ve done, except of course when I whacked my dog smack in the face with a tennis ball. But, she asked for it. She got in the way when I threw it for her to fetch. Am I off the hook now?
Off the hook. Okay, so, I just need to find the right carrot for them to follow… they are both fascinated with strips of paper, so that might work… Then again, we constantly flicking the piece of paper to keep their attention seems like even more work than hauling the barrel myself. I guess, it had to come to this, I am my own mule.
Don’t give up so easily, friend. How about attaching something shiny and glittery to the end of a pole? That might work. Or maybe you might have a vehicle that’s better able to get close to the well itself, mine just wouldn’t make it. I had to add an ox to the scenario.
Enter the Subaru!!! Brilliant. I think I’m covered now. You just saved me all kinds of effort. Thank you, thank you, thank you. (on hands and knees, muttering “We’re not worthy” over and over.)
Oh stop groveling, I hate grovelling…. Does that reference mean anything to you?
Um…. Monty Python. Don’t worry I won’t apologize or avert my eyes or anything like that. I’m not planning on going to Camelot either… ’tis a silly place.
LOL. Ha ha. Love it. You now have my eternal fake internet friendship.
Hooray! You had me at “LOL.” 😛
This is so good I am not going to just make a joke. I am going to think carefuly about it… for ever…
I’ll be waiting for it..forever.
You just might at that.
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The fountain of youth is over at my place. Stop on my for a drink.
It’s midnight here in Ohio, and I know you went to bed a long time ago. It’s kind of creepy here at your blog when no one is around and the place is quiet. I can’t believe I’m still proofreading. Only about 25 pages to go, but jeez my eyes are tired. Maybe I could put some of that Fountain of Youth water in my eyes and see again. I’d like to drink enough to take me back several pounds ago. But seriously, I like how you addressed this. It would be terrible to live forever and watch your loved ones age and fall apart around you.
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