Hi! My name is Daisy! Some XXX LIVE NUDE GIRLS folks call me the cutest dog in the world. SUPERBOWL HALFTIME SHOW My Mom calls me ZIG ZIGLAR Daisy The Wonder Mutt. My Dad calls me Fuzz Face, or Daisy Mae Mobley or LINDSAY LOHAN.
My favorite game is POWERBALL. My dad putts the EASY MONEY tennis balls down the hallway with a LUNAR ECLIPSE, and I chase them and try to gather them all up. MALCOM X TAPE I try to get them all in my mouth at the same time JESSICA SIMPSON. A bag of tennis balls lasts about two weeks before I destroy them. GIRLS GIRLS GIRLS
I can’t stand it when my Dad is gone. $16 HOUSE He can’t even go out to mow the yard without having me freak out like a little baby. ZSA ZSA GABOR. AMAZON STORES He’s been gone since Monday, and my Mom is so lame. RASPBERRY KETONE She really sucks at the Herdball. Hurry home Daddy. STEVEN VAN ZANDT
The other night, Mom was SO lame at the Herball FACEBOOK that I turned on my HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE CURE Christmas Eyes OBAMA GRANDMOTHER to make her a little more playful.
I like to ride in the car. I can appreciate the beauty of a LOIN CLOTH Nebraska SAMSUNG TABLET sunset just as much as the next dog JFK INTERN.
Since I’m only nine months old RANDY TRAVIS , I am used to having things my own way. These MICROSOFT SURFACE people give me whatever I want most of the time. When they don’t I pout like a little princess. NIKKI MINAJ Then I chew on the leg of the chair or something. PINTEREST PANDORA TWITTER
More Christmas Eyes. SUPER BOWL IRS DEBRA MESSING XXXXXXXX PORN PORN UNDIES
This is me resting after a DECENT game of GISELE BUNDCHEN, which I don’t get if Dad isn’t home. My mom is such a LOSER. NAKED LADY PARTS
See how much I miss my Dad? INCREASE BLOG TRAFFIC I laid at the bottom of the steps this morning FOREVER! But he never came down. Where is he? CHEAP NO NAME VIAGRA IN PLAIN BROWN WRAPPER My Mom is so weird, I wouldn’t be surprised if he NEVER came back. She can’t even use a golf club.
See Mom? WORK FROM HOME I’m supposed to look like WHAT’S THAT THING ON MY FACE when we’re all done. Too pooped to do anything but pant. Get a grip old lady. DOCTOR WANTS STOOL SAMPLE
Here I go. I HATE THE HOLIDAYS Exhibiting CHEEKY POSES destructive behavior because YOU BORE ME!!!! You may have your TWILIGHT BREAKING DAWN 2 shower curtain back AFTER you play with me for a few more hours. JUSTIN BEIBER
Oh sure, stick me outside! OSCAR BUZZ You’re so mean! SKYFALL It must be 60 degrees out here! Look at that! I froze my tail off. One day, PAULA DEEN CHRISTMAS RECIPES I’m going to figure out how to get past this big white thing you stuck between me and the big world out there. NAUGHTY NAUGHTY
HOT REDHEADS Okay, now I’m just mad, so I’m going to chew the rug I PAD . Go ahead and yell. UPS TRACKING I look like I’m sorry, but I’m not. Turn your back. I dare you. OHIO LOTTERY WINNERS
Just look at me!!! HOT TWINS I’m so cute! KINDLE FIRE How can you possibly stay mad at that face??? WTF?
You’re such a rube. VICTORIA’S SECRET MODELS I’m chewing my own toy, like a good girl, but only while you’re looking. SODA STREAM Them are some mighty tasty baseboards in this hall way. Buuuaaahaaaahaaaa. PIZZA HUT
Okay, I’m tired. DANCING WITH THE STARS And typing CHIA PET is even more boring then playing the Herdball with my lame-o Mom. Time for another power nap. BEST CYBER WEEK DEALS
Thought I would sneak a few key search terms into this cute little post about my dog. I bet you didn’t even notice most of them, did you? I will let you know the results of this highly scientific experiment next Friday. NUNS WEARING THONGS
Let’s hear about your SEO attempts and some of your most popular or craziest search terms.
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The Cheeky Diva 
Shameless Cheeky!
Your point being? 😉
You might be on to something here. PORN PORN UNDIES!
We’ll see. Of course, you’ll get my full report next Friday. 😉
This is some serious keyword porn! The pictures are awesome!
Oh, and I still want to be an Ohio Lottery Winner. 🙂
who wouldn’t?
Thanks! Daisy is going to be so excited when Mr Cheeky gets home today. But I’m not. I’m too old for that. 😉
And I have the nerve to call myself shameless. Here is your crown back.
Woo Hoo!!!!! I am the UNDISPUTED CHAMPION OF SHAMELESS BLOG PIMPING. Did I say that loud enough? It’ll take a couple of days for the crawlers to find this, but today, I have had 5 hits already for..wait for it… FREE PRON. Really. Pervs can’t even spell anymore?
I said something in the post I did to warn new readers that I wasn’t all about babies… I guess I mentioned I do funny stuff with mustaches… search hits for ‘famous people with mustaches’ today; 46
Really? That’s great. I don’t ever get that many searches ever! But I did actually get a few for me yesterday. A handful of people actually searched “the cheeky diva” squee! That doesn’t happen often.
I have been searched lots of times… airports, beside police cars, concerts, I could go on.
Why doesn’t that surprise me?
Nor should it. I likes me my pat down. Frisk me, Dano.
Alrightythen…………
Ha.
But, hey, you have to admit, Daisy is one cute dog. If I had photo shop, I might just do a Daisy Week.
Pictures work. She doesn’t need extra eyes.
It would be fun to put her face on someone famous though.
I could do that for you.
Really? That would be so cool!
You need to remind me next week.
Aren’t you too busy to do that? Feel free to steal all the dog pics you want and just do your magic whenever you have time. 🙂
Just remind me. I will forget. But it wont take too long.
Will do. Love the new pic with Willy, and yes, he is the cutest thing in that picture.
A cute little varmint.
клубных вечеринок This would be my best, most bizarre search criteria. Very good post! Subliminal messages mostly, and are sure to increase your blog traffic. Of course the searcher will be pissed off once he gets to your site because you fooled him. He thought he’d get “pron” but not so much.
Lynn, Darling! Do I really care about pissing off people who don’t find there way here because they are drawn to my wacky mad cap blogadventures? Certainly not! I only care about pissing off my regular pals. Thanks for reading this total garbage. At least you got cute puppy pics, which may be the only saving grace for this entire post.
HA HA HA HA! This is hilarious! I used to do this all the time! Here’s some blog post titles I’ve used in the past, including my most popular post:
*It’s A Freshly Pressed Unicorn Rainbow Bunny Kitty Explosion!
*Truly Awful Joke Day! Nothing About Tucker Max or Facebook Parenting or Lesbian Porn Here!
*Cynically Boosting Traffic The Shameless Porn Sex Lottery Lesbian Nigerian Bieber Kardashian Way
*Time For Another Sex Porn Poop Lottery Celebrity Blog Post With Random Links (Links Added!)
*Spamments 6! With A Side Of Search Terms! Like Steampunk Lesbian Nun Crystal Banana Elves
I’ve actually read some of those! Does it really work? It’s so weird what people search for. Our dear friend Arthur mentioned he had 45 hits for “famous men with moustaches” somewhere yesterday, you may have seen that already. I’ve never had 45 hits for a search of any kind! Mr. TheCheekyDiva said it was just too out there for him so he stopped reading and just looked at the cute dog pictures. That’s okay. I didn’t figure he’d like it too much. But he did love the one about gross old recipes.
Yes, it really does. The trick, I think, is to see what search terms people use to find your blog, and then just use them MORE! I have combinations of elegant and porn. Like sadness, waterfall, romance… and then lesbians, chicks, hot chicks, and wife shitting on my chest. Seriously.
Are you kidding me? I did the “Free Porn Here” post at the suggestion of Adlibb3d. Gosh he’s funny. Anywho, it took a couple of days for the search gods to add it, but since then, every day, I get at least a few hits for free porn. I did actually get a hit from “fat ladies cheeky poses Pinterest” one time. Ewwwww.
About the FREE PRON . . it’s hard to type with one hand. Give ’em a break. Yes, you are shameless, but I wasn’t going to mention it, because I wouldn’t want to give you the satisfaction. You are satisfied now, aren’t you?
….hard to type with one hand….now THAT’S funny! Thanks! Are YOU satisfied? Should be interesting to see if I really get any hits for these search terms. Of course, the results will be posted.
I was trying to catch up on my reading, and the minute I saw the title, I knew it was yours. How’s that for a reputation?
Cereal? That rocks! Thanks! My power grows by inches daily. Buuuuhaaahaaaaa!
You Deev, I came here for the Porn?
Sorry Adam, this isn’t the blog you’ve been looking for.
I did it but i didn’t have a cute puppy!
Your way was very skilfull. Well done!
Way to milk the search-terms! :p
Just wanted to have some fun with it. You won’t see me do this often. Thanks for suffering through it. 🙂
I’m not too sure you won’t. 😉
Hahaha, my pleasure (sort of) O.o X)
Today it’s back to normal Diva stuff. Introducing a fun, new porn free weekly feature, and if time allows, maybe some food poems or that stocking stuffer post I promised. I have a few things up my sleeve, but not quite as shameless and dreadful as this.
Hahahah, looking forward to it. But I’ll probably go through it some time later on in the next two weeks.
Exams begin in one day!
BARF! Well, I’d be honored if you drop by when you need a break from thinking.
My thoughts exactly. I would be honored if my brain allowed me to not be distracted and actually study. That way – I can actually make time to honor you.
Er.. if you get what I mean. :p
Such a clever post, absolutely fantastic, I hope you got some seriour traffic after this one.
Wayne
Thanks, and I hope so too. Pretty shameless awful stuff. Thanks for following. Hope you find some stuff here that’s a little less…..awful. 🙂
At least I know you follow your own advice! Too funny!
Oh thanks. It’s pretty dreadful, but hey, can’t blame a guy for trying. I did get one hit for Naked Porn yesterday, but Free Porn is still the clear winner for now.
Ooh! Just got one for “Linsday Lohan Naked XXX” This shit really works!
Ahahaha! Now to delete my history because this is awkward…
Ha ha! Sorry. Well, doesn’t matter how you got here. You’re here. Are you the one who searched for Nuns wearing thongs?
😉
Oh darn, you caught me! Except I meant to type Huns wearing thongs.
Oooohhhh. Okay, you’re excused. Yesterday I got 2 hits for “superbowl movies XXX” ?? Maybe they were looking for highlight reels from Super Bowl 30? I can only hope. 🙂
If they searched for Super Bowl XXXVIII they might find what they were hopefully not looking for. (That was the year with the Janet Jackson scandal)
Brilliant!
Other than my Home page, and my Freshly Pressed post, this is pretty much my top page. Pretty sad, considering how much shit I actually write.
Hey, as long as it brings people in…
But do they read? The pervs and retrobates, do they read?
Hello, darlin’! I wrote you a little thank you note for the award. It’s under the “Trophies and Stuff” tab at the top of my page. Check it out, and thanks!
HI there! I will go and check it out. Happy New Year! 🙂
Happy Nude Year!
This reads like a mad libs game.
A very bad one. Since the pervs keep it as my “top post” a lot of real readers look at it too. But the perv hits outnumber the real ones almost 4 to 1 anymore. Incredible.
Hey, hits are hits.
Where did you find the most popular search terms? This post is hilarious. So sad for the ones looking for pron.
Um, let me think. Actually I think they were Yahoo search terms. I think if you just type “weeks most searched terms” in a search engine, there are a lot of services that do it. I used all terms on the list from the week I did that post. A sprinkled it with porn terms just for fun.
My most popular key word today is simply “porn” by itself. Most days it’s something more elaborate. I went home for lunch and typed that word into Google to see if I could find myself.
I scrolled through 20 pages of results, and I wasn’t even there! How the hell are these people finding me? I almost think this is some type of computer or maching that’s doing this now, but I don’t know how or why. It’s just insanity.
I should put Word Ads back on the blog and take advantage of all these hits. I took it off after earning a whopping 14 cents of having the ads on my blog for 2 months. It really screwed up my home page, and would only display the current post, and then a tv commercial. I didn’t like it. But maybe it’s time to put them back. 😉
Bwahahahahahahaha. That made my night.
Thanks! Can I vote for you? Good luck with your campaign for Mayor of Boise! 🙂
Your interwebs guide for old people had me rolling on the floor by the way. Nice work!
That is great praise from a master! I am honored! Thank you!
Funny, I just put WordAds back on today, after earning a whopping 14 cents in two months. Now that this post gets me monster hits, I thought why not. I emailed Word Ads regarding how they pay and they said that this post would be blocked from ads, but it looks to me like there’s one on it, so maybe this crazy dog who eats everything in my house that’s not food will start to pay me back through Word Ads. Wouldn’t that be a kick in the pants? And I am by no means a master, your words are too kind. I’m merely fearless when it comes to spouting what ever falls out of my head, no matter how ill conceived or incorrect it may be. Lucky for me, some folks appear to like it! 🙂
I am reading this post for the third time an it still cracks me up. I am yet to convince myself to use this strategy because a lot of family members read my blog but I am still doing my research to increase traffic to my blog. Daisy is such a cute Dog 🙂
Or should I say PORN PORN UNDIES cute LOHAN dog BEIBER?
Ha ha! Thanks! It’s a double edged sword, that’s for sure. It gets tons of hits now, but makes me wonder if any real people are still reading. Thanks for helping me out with that! I’m still tempted to take it down, but it’s a fun experiment to watch. Crazy!
🙂
Don’t take it down, Daisy needs more publicity. Of course many readers are there for your witty posts esp Haiku so let those creeps increase your blog hits, they might also get a good laugh out of this
The fame has gone to her head. Did you see that she’s on Twitter now? Cheeky dog. 😉
Oh my. Actually I didn’t know. Will be following the FREE MONEY dog now. I do remember reading in a recent post about Daisy Tweeting while you were sewing your quilt, did take it literally though 🙂
Oh yeah, on the right side of my page, there’s a follow Daisy on Twitter button. I know, I’m such a dork.
Incredibly clever — I’m in awe!!
P.S. The puppy’s adorable.
Oh, god! You have to read my post called “Sorry if you took a wrong turn on the internets” its about this post and what a monster it’s become. I think it now has gotten over 9000 hits since I posted it. Insane! I’m just reading your blog right now. I love it! I think we’re gonna be pals too! 🙂 Dorks unite!
Dorks Forever!! I know what it is to create a monster … but not on WordPress … yet. I’ll find the “sorry” post and revel in it! So happy to have discovered you!
Ditto! I’m quite impressed with your Pinterest page, my dear. You have quite an impressive fan base!
Well that’s one way to increase your hit ratio…. I would have to guess your bounce rate is through the roof, however.
Well, the hits were insane for about a month, then fell to almost nothing just a few days ago, which is fine. I’m unfamiliar with the term “bounce rate”. Would you be so kind as to enlighten me? 🙂